Diario privato
22/01/2021
Chi sa se parli di me
Chi sa se parli di me qualche volta
distrattamente , se racconti del suono delle mie risate.
Se racconti dei miei scherzi inutili avvolte stupidi ma pur sempre pianificati
se racconti delle lunghe chiacchierate , dei momenti di inevitabile confessione.
Giorni passati a raccontare una vita in poche parole.
Chi sa se ogni tanto pensi a quanto poteva essere e non è stato ,
quanti errori abbiamo fatto ora
che quel ricordo è solo polvere , posato su un libro mai scritto
lo sfogli distrattamente .
Pagine bianche
che nessuno mai leggera’ , perche’ troppo poco tempo c’è stato
per poterlo riempire
ed ora il mio nome rimane solo una semplice lettera macchiata d’inchiostro
quasi irriconoscibile, lacerato dal tempo, dai solchi che ogni giorno lo scalfivano.
Le emozioni , i respiri , i profumi non si sentono neanche piu’ nell’aria
tramutati in assordante silenzio , che rimbomba
in una stanza vuota troppo vuota per essere riempita.
Ricordami qualche volta
ricorda la mia voce che urlava , il fumo delle mie sigarette fumate
distrattamente
che si spegnevano ogni volta tra le dita, senza quasi accorgersene.
Le continue riflessioni , i pensieri e le paure
il dirsi ogni volta è andata cosi non poteva andare diversamente
perche’ è solo cosi che potevano le mie lacrime
bagnare le mie gote
ancora calde e rosse
dopo mesi di inutili spasmi.
Chi sa se qualche volta parli di me con te stesso o se con qualcuno
affermi di non aver potuto fare altrimenti ,
il suono della mia voce era cosi fastidioso da
farti innervosire eppure sentire che era inadeguato
in quel preciso momento.
Raccontami ogni tanto per non farmi diventare
solo un polveroso ricordo spazzato dal caldo vento
di una sera di mezza estate.
Chi sa se qualche volta lo pensi o se non hai la forza ancora di
poterlo urlare….
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