Diario di una quarantenne

Diario privato

i miei demoni

3/01/2021

I miei demoni

I miei demoni , appaiono , quando meno me lo aspetto ,

loro  arrivano silenziosamente , lentamente e creano cosi d’improvviso il caos dentro e fuori di me.

Sento il disordine , la stanza come in un uragano , le mani che stringono il collo , piano piano inizio a soffocare

non sento l’aria , non riesco ad urlare.

Inerme attendo che tutto finisca , non posso oppormi

a quell’inutile e se pur sciocco pensiero

quasi arrogante di averli superati.

Li lascio fare tanto finiranno , basta poco solo attendere.

I caos è dentro e fuori di me, il muro che avevo costruito

e su cui avevo scritto rinascita

è crollato nuovamente .

La distruzione

Loro hanno distrutto tutto in un attimo , come la scossa ti terremoto

butta giu’ i piatti della credenza dal nulla e silenziosamente , come

quando piove d’untratto quando c’è il sole

non puoi prevederlo.

Li lascio fare tanto so che finiranno presto , giusto il tempo di

mettere tutto a soqquadro , poi andranno via.

Per ritornare al prossimo giro alla prossima data , alla prossima scadenza.

Mi volto affannosamente respiro , riprendo fiato , riprendo aria la voce no quella non è tornata non riesco ad emettere gemito.

Guardo i caos cerco di raccattare qualcosa ma so che oggi non ci riusciro’

Domani domani forse ricomincero’ a costruire quel muro su cui avevo scritto

con le mie stesse lacrime

la parola

RINASCITA

io te

Comments

comments

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